Alex: Okay, I know what you're thinking: How in the name of David Bowie did you think the Oakland Raiders were going to make the playoffs this year? Basically, my reasoning was this: 1) there always seems to be that one team that not even their own fans believe in that catches fire and makes the playoffs. Last year it was Miami. I saw potential in JaMarcus Russell and had invested a fourth round fantasy pick (like many others) in Darren McFadden. Like George Dubya said after 9/11 -- Nev-uh Ah-gan. Besides, it's partially not my fault. I only thought Tom Cable had punched one of his assistants, but it turns out he may have hit a number of former girlfriends/wives as well. If only he could channel that aggressiveness to his defense, instead of, you know, women.
Beyond that, I feel all right. Denver is gonna take out San Diego, but none of us saw that coming. I still believe in the Texans, especially since we KNOW Tennessee and Jacksonville aren't going anywhere in that division, and I still think San Francisco isn't out of it because if the rest of the NFL is the Big Ten, then the NFC West is the Sun Belt conference. Anything could happen. Beyond that, it would appear that instead of betting on the Vikings to go 8-8, I get the joy of betting against Brett Favre in the playoffs. Fine by me, even if he's just a gunslinger that's having fun out there like a kid in the yard blah blah blah. Hang me by my Wranglers (sounds like a country song).
Patrick: How did I pick Jacksonville to make the playoffs, even as a wildcard? Maybe I saw Maurice Jones-Drew and thought their offense would be awesome, but I forgot their QB is David Garrard and their receivers are a bunch of scrubs and the aging Torry Holt. Oh, and they don't know how to play defense. I didn't see Cincinnati becoming as good as they are, but no one did. If they win their next two games against division rivals Baltimore and Pittsburgh, they'll essentially wrap up their division. I'm all for it, even if it means my picks were wrong, because that will mean a few more Ocho Cinco TD celebrations and maybe even an opportunity for Dhani Jones to tackle the globe in a bow-tie.
I'm pretty sure my Indy and New Orleans picks are pretty safe, but really, I would never have guessed the Saints would be this good. When a team is so deep at WR and RB that Reggie Bush is basically a wasted roster spot, you know they're going to be pretty hard to stop. Even though the Vikings are going to win the NFC North (because Old Man Favre has Adrian Peterson and a fantastic offensive line to keep him from throwing stupid interceptions), I'll say this: Aaron Rodgers looked like the better QB in both Vikings/Packers matchups, and that's not just because Rodgers didn't cry.
Ian: I'm still going to be 100% accurate in my predictions.
Tennessee is going to run the table and finish 10-6 -- this team's performance last year wasn't an illusion. Denver is a piece of shit team masquerading as a 6-1 team, and Josh McDaniels's mad fist-pumping after the New England win jinxed his team like Joba's fist pump after striking out Kenji Johjima in the third inning on August 16 did. In the most surprising development, the mobsters holding Jake Delhomme's wife hostage are going to be taken out by Brett Favre in an FBI operation (yeah, Favre does that on days off. Oh, you didn't know?), and Jake will play lights-out for the rest of the season and lead Carolina to the division title. During this raid, Favre will break his hand, and Brad Childress will refuse to sit him down, which wouldn't torpedo the Vikings' season except for causing him to fumble on every other handoff to Adrian Peterson.
Oh, and Ocho Cinco will get suspended by Roger Goodell for Tweeting in the end zone after scoring a touchdown, and the Bengals will falter.
I should have bet money on my predictions!
1 comment:
Is this the Alex Strum who moved out of Brighton? If so, I have a Hofstra diploma that belongs to you. You can write me at anitawadhwa@gmail.com and I'll mail it your way. Thanks, Anita
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